Raising Twins: What Parents Want to Know (and What Twins Want to Tell Them), by Eileen M. Pearlman, Ph.D., and Jill Alison Ganon (2000)
This month I plan to review several books on rearing twins. I'll use this same format for each review--repetitive, yes, but good for comparing.
Author credentials: Eileen Pearlman is an identical twin herself, with a Ph.D.; she is the director of TwInsight, "which provides counseling, workshops, and seminars to multiples and their families."
Range covered: birth to adolescence
Input/quotes from twins and parents of twins: yes, extensive from both; interview/discussion format
Interesting photos: yes, extensive; black-and-white
Twin-specific information (as opposed to lots of information that is true of all children, such as that it is tiring and frustrating to care for them): yes, and in fact singleton child-rearing information is presented separately for comparison
Basically:This is a book about the developmental stages of twin children, compared to the developmental stages of non-twin children. It's also a book about what it's like to be a twin. The main point--made with a touch of defensiveness--is that twins are not "the twins" but two separate children, and that each twin pair will be different from every other twin pair: some will want to be in the same classroom and some won't; some will want to participate in the same activities and some won't; some will look alike and act alike and some won't; but no matter what, the twins are two individual people and should be treated that way. The author is adamant about not dressing or naming twins alike. As I was reading, I felt conflicted emotions coming from the pages: as if on one hand the authors wanted to say how special and interesting it is to be a twin, but on the other hand they wanted to say how twins are just like other people.
Twins! Pregnancy, Birth and the First Year of Life, by Connie L. Agnew, M.D., Alan H. Klein, M.D., and Jill Alison Ganon (1997)
This month I plan to review several books on rearing twins. I'll use this same format for each review--repetitive, yes, but good for comparing.
Author credentials: Connie L. Agnew is a perinatologist (deals with the time between the 20th week of gestation and the 28th day of a newborn's life--I had to look it up), specializing in the care of high-risk mothers and infants. Alan H. Klein is a pediatrician and a perinatologist, specializing in high-risk infant care.
Range covered: pregnancy through the first year
Input/quotes from twins and parents of twins: extensive from parents of twins but not from twins themselves (not within range of book); interview/discussion format
Interesting photos: no, except for a few ultrasound photos; but illustrated with drawings
Twin-specific information (as opposed to lots of information that is true of all children, such as that it is tiring and frustrating to care for them): Some, though much of the book is a regular infant-care manual with asides about how it may be different with twins, plus some additional sections about things such as preferring one twin over the other, or when one twin has to stay in the hospital. There are also drawings of what the mother's body looks like during the different stages of pregnancy, showing also the twins inside; and ultrasound photos of twin pregnancies.
Basically:This is a book about twin pregnancy (the first 150 pages), and the care of infant twins (the first two months get about 85 pages; the next ten months get about 35 pages). There are the same sections you'd find in any infant care book: childproofing, growth charts, immunization information, emergency numbers to keep by the phone, lists of how many sleepers you'll need for a new baby, what age to start solids. Someone who had children already would find most of the book a review--and since this book was published in 1997, some of it is out of date. There is, however, more emphasis on the care of premature infants than in a standard baby book, and there are discussions with parents of twins.
The Joy of Twins and Other Multiple Births: Having, Raising, and Loving Babies Who Arrive in Groups, by Pamela Patrick Novotny (1988)
This month I plan to review several books on rearing twins. I'll use this same format for each review--repetitive, yes, but good for comparing.
Author credentials: Pamela Patrick Novotny is the mother of identical twin girls.
Range covered: Hard to pinpoint. The book focuses mostly on the time when parents would be adjusting to the idea of twins, so most of it is about pregnancy and the months right after the birth. However, it also covers issues such as whether to separate the twins in school, so saying "pregnancy and the first months" wouldn't be completely accurate.
Input/quotes from twins and parents of twins: quotes and anecdotes from parents of mulitiples
Interesting photos: yes, extensive; black-and-white
Twin-specific information (as opposed to lots of information that is true of all children, such as that it is tiring and frustrating to care for them): yes, but plenty of the true-of-all-children kind as well
Basically:It seems there are two types of parents: those who consider twins an astonishing and wonderful surprise and can't believe how lucky they are; and those who consider twins a burden to be suffered and dealt with and worked through. This book would be a lifesaver for the latter group, parents who are tired of other people acting like twins are exciting news. There is good information here about how to deal with a negative attitude--but since it naturally assumes a negative attitude, it will baffle the parents who feel like they won the lottery.
The author sure has a bee up her hive on the subject of not dressing twins alike. Oh holy night, did I ever get sick of the "You COULD dress your children alike, I SUPPOSE, if you don't mind TELLING THE WORLD that you consider them salt-and-pepper shakers, an unbreakable set, one mind in two bodies, a freak show. But of course it's up to YOU. As long as you CONSIDER what MESSAGE you're sending." Just when I thought we'd THOROUGHLY covered the author's opinion on that topic, it would pop up again.
For practical coping tips, this is a terrific book. There's a particularly good section about how to deal with all the "You have to have help!" advice: the author says well, maybe you can't; but if you can, here's how to choose where to get the help and how to use it. There's good information on how to breastfeed twins, how to manage twins on outings, how to deal with questions from the public. But keep in mind that the book is many years out of date by now, and that any medical information is given by someone whose credentials don't include medical school.
The Wonder Spot, by Melissa Bank (2005)
I liked this book just as much as Melissa Bank's first book, The Girls' Guide to Hunting and Fishing (which was about neither hunting nor fishing), and in fact I think I liked it more. It's a book I would read again and again, and probably put on my wish list to own in hardcover.